It's A Start

This was the best result we could get without completely damaging my hair.

The underneath is still black but there are a few highlights worked in here and there to try and tone down the color some.

It's much better than black and my roots will blend much better. It'll be a few visits until I get it lightened to where I want it but I rather have (kinda) healthy hair than the color I really want right now.

But I like it. And more importantly, the kids approve. Hubba Bubba hasn't seen it yet but he likes all my different hair colors. It's like he gets a new wife every few months. =)

On a different note, tomorrow I will start up my P90X workouts again. I stopped due to a cyst in my spinal cord. It's still there and I've been a little chicken to start working out again. Walking, jogging and all that low-impact stuff isn't really a problem for my spine but it's boring. Plus I want some results I can feel and see.

Here's an image of the issue in my spinal cord. Or the medical term, the Syringomyelia.

I did get the OK from the Doc back in January that I could workout again. And he knew about the weight lifting and stuff that I use to do so he knew I wasn't talking about simple shit. I've just been in a lot of (silent) pain lately and I'm a little chicken to start a hardcore workout again.

So tomorrow, expect me to report in about how difficult my one-hour workout was and in the following day's, I can guarantee some whining.

Happy Hump Day everybody! And if you have a glass of wine, have a second one for me.

Weigh In, Orange Marker, A Color Change

So today's weigh-in results -170.6 lbs. Exactly 2lbs. less than last week. I was hoping I could kiss the 70's goodbye this weigh-in but I'll for sure be in the 60's next week.

And for lunch today, Jack-in-the-Crack. That seems to be a good pattern for me. I eat well throughout the entire week and weekend (usually), then I weigh-in Monday morning and come lunch time, it's cheat time.

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Today we started getting things done around the house to help us prepare for our move. My hubby joked that once we start getting ready to list the house for rent, something's going to go wrong. Like juice will get spilled on the carpet or there will be holes put in the wall from moving furniture or something like that.

He jinxed us.

Today, Bean decided she wanted to make our Silver Drop painted walls (it's a very light grey) a little brighter. She took an orange marker to them. =( Luckily it was a washable marker so it didn't do any permanent damage.

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On Wednesday I will be venturing into the hair salon. A lady who was my make-up & hair chick on a shoot will try and get the black out of my hair. I'm a frequent flyer in the hair coloring department and I'm done with the black. And hopefully this time I have learned my lesson about how difficult this color is to get out.

The image of me to the right, that's about as close to my natural color that you're probably going to see. On Wednesday, I'm shooting for a caramel shade. Below are some hair colors I'm considering.

What number is your favorite?

8.6 Pounds - It's Not What You Think

It's been a rough day for Momo's (aka Max), and his momma.

Yesterday evening I noticed that he was taking very quick breaths but he was acting normal so I didn't worry too much about it.

This morning, same thing.

After googling for a while I learned that the normal number of breaths for a dog is 12-20 a minute and that rapid breathing could be a sign of pain or respiratory issues. I timed Max's breathing and he came in at 102 in one minute.

I called the Vet.

They told me to bring him in right away and when we got there, lungs and everything else checked out fine. Unfortunately, he was panting because he was so excited from his car ride that they couldn't get an accurate resting (breathing) count.

The Vet dude told me that he thinks Max may have a collapsed larynx and that an issue like this is common in smaller breeds. The only way to diagnose is with an x-ray that comes in close to $1,000.00. (We weren't able to see our military vet because they're an hour and a half away and at the time, I didn't think we had that much time to spare.)

I decided to pay for my visit and take Max home to see what our military vet would suggest doing and to also see if the x-rays would be any cheaper. Before leaving, the Vet told me to bring in a video of his breathing so that they could see what I was talking about since they were only able to meet Hyper-Max.

Once we got home, the breathing trouble continued. I made a video on my phone and brought it in to the Vet. He is still thinking it's the larynx and said that since Max's lungs, heart rate and everything else check out OK (and he's not in any pain), that we should try to manage this issue with diet.

He admitted that Max isn't too plump but weighing in at 8.6lbs., he could stand to lose a pound or two. It's probably all that Great Dane food he's been eating. LOL! He said that 1lb. to a dog is like 30lbs. to a human. So Momo's has been put on a 1/2 cup a day diet until he can drop a couple L.B's. The point of this, by losing weight and fat around his rib cage, the Vet is hoping that it'll relieve some of the pressure on the larynx.

Momo's is doing fine right now. His breathing has seemed to slow a bit, I think we're still high though, around 70-80 breaths a minute. But he's acting completely normal, a whole lotta lazy.

Also, just a note, I googled "Momo" to see if there was a better way to spell Max's little nickname (we also call him Maximus and Max-a-mo from time to time) and below is the Urban Dictionary's definition for Momo.

MOMO: A generic insult used to describe one who is irritating, annoying, or an idiot. (synonyms include but are not limited too: ass, asshole, bastard, bitch, blockhead, bonehead, cocksucker, dick, dickhead, dolt, dope, dunce, fool, halfwit, idiot, imbecile, jackass, jerk, mother-fucker, nincompoop, ninny, nitwit, numskull, rascal, scamp, schmo, schmuck, simpleton, son of a bitch, tomfool, twerp)

Maybe we'll stick with Max-a-Mo from now on.

Goodbye California

This Summer I will have to say "see you later" to my honey for the first time in 5 years. He is being deployed and it looks like the kids and I are gonna head back to Texas so we can spend the year with my family. They miss me.

Enter STRESS!

One major step in our move has been completed. I have found D a private school in Texas that sounds pretty great and is actually affordable. The first school I found, their tuition was $16, 715. For a 5th grader. For one year! HA! I care a lot about my son's education, but not that damn much.

Second major step to accomplish, we need to find a renter for our home. Stress. Stress. Stress. Once this is all done, the rest (as much as it is) is just gravy baby.

And I have to cut this post short because said Honey has just made it home from work and we have lots to talk about.

Happy Day After Valentine's Day

I was a bit moody yesterday, mainly because the damn scale didn't show me the 2 pounds I wanted to lose.

Yesterday's weight: 172.6

So what, 1 pound 2 ounces gone? I guess that's not too bad. Expecially since Ms. Bloat is in town for the month. And I did have 3 cheat meals last week. That's two more than what I wanted to allow but they were delicious!

Things have been stressful over here. Lots of changes that are fast approaching with the military; a possible move and my honey being gone for a year. =( This will be the first time he's been away from the kids for that long and I know they're going to miss him dearly, as well as him missing them. I don't even want to think about it right now. I'm already trying to figure out ways to keep myself busy so the time will go by faster.

Yesterday I saw the previews for a new show that's going to air on Lifetime called Coming Home. Soldiers that were deployed being reunited with their loved ones. Lots of clips of children seeing Daddy again. It was a 30 second commercial and I was bawling 5 seconds in. I think I was probably more emotional than normal because of our recent news and maybe a little bit because of my situation with my father. That's a story for another day.

Living with NMO - A Video

Below is a video of patients diagnosed with NMO; joined by the wonderful Doctors who are fighting like hell to find a cure for them. I am very proud to be a part of this video and to have my husband there by my side. Taped November 10, 2010.

Happy Friday!

I'm looking forward to this weekend. A weekend where the Hubs is off from work and we have some fun stuff to do. We have a soccer tournament this Sat. and Sun. because my awesome son (who calls himself a Professional Soccer Player) is on the All Stars team.

"D" - Goalie Extraordinaire

Two games on Saturday and one on Sunday. And if we kick butt, we'll move on to some other tournament. I think. And the best part, it's not so freakin' cold here anymore so we can actually enjoy the games without frostbite. Yay!! We're also taking D out to his favorite restaurant in between the games since he got a 100% on his science test. Double Yay!!! And after all that fun, a relaxing evening at home and maybe a movie.

I hope everyone has a great weekend!

Are You Still With Me?

I hope I didn't scare any of you off with the "Raging Bitch" post yesterday. You'll be happy to know, I'm all better. =)

Today, I resisted temptation. Not to strangle or run over someone, but to steer my vehicle away from the fast food joints. Well, the first one I was sort of forced to resist because they were closed. But the second option, now that one, I resisted!

I had a couple of errands to run this morning after dropping my son off at school. Bean was with me (for future reference, my daughter's nickname is Bean) and while waiting at Staples to get a printing order complete, she informed me that she wanted tater tots.

Mmmmmm tater tots....

Did this dieting Mommy deny my daughter the freedom to eat tater tots? Hell No! I told her I'll get a meal and she can save me some calories by eating my tater tots. =) Well, Sonic was closed so we had to pass up those tots and move to the next. Burger King.

Somewhere during the 10 minute drive towards Burger King (which you can see from my backyard by the way) my mind flashed to my checkbook. Not because I was broke but I was remembering a time where I would spend a ridiculous amount of money on fast food. Every other entry in my log would be fast food. It was terrible, really.

We manage pretty well I manage pretty well now with staying away from fast food, except for outings when we're not near home and the occasional, "I don't give a damn about calories and fat I just want a freakin' cheeseburger!". I even started a monthly menu for our dinners at home. And I'm proud to say that I started that back in April of last year and we're still stickin' to it! It saves a bundle on groceries too, since you're not roaming the aisles throwing this-and-that in there and hoping to form a few decent meals with all the stuff when you get home.

Anyway, I wanted to keep my checkbook "clean" so I did what what any one would do to avoid a screaming match, I lied to my daughter. I told her that Burger King was closed too. She was cool with it (Thank God), and I told her that we would go home and she could have a snack! Yay! (And for the record, she had already had a full breakfast prior to leaving the house, the tots were just a bonus.)

And for breakfast, I ate a Fiji apple and two hard-boiled eggs. And you wanna hear my childhood meets adulthood lunch? I had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with brocolli on the side. Weird combo, but both delicious.

It's Just One of Those Days

Where EVERYTHING is pissing me off.

I don't know if anyone else ever experiences this but do you ever just have those days where you want to tell someone (everyone) how you truly feel? Today is that day for me. And it's not PMS, it's just pure bitch! LOL!

I can't tell you what it was that set me off but there were many people worthy of seeing the "pure bitch" in me today. Although I managed to mantain my sanity.

Case in Point # 1 - I check in on the National MS Society page on Facebook every now and then and I came across a post from a man that made me so irritated yet I said nothing. Maybe because even when I am a raging bitch, I still have a heart. He was saying, and I quote, "I hate when family members keep asking how I'm feeling all the time, Why? Okay, I have MS, nothing has changed. I don't need your sympathy and don't need to be told to relax and rest."

Part of that, I completely understand. When you're diagnosed with an illness, many do not want to be treated any differently by their loved ones. Myself included. But here's my beef with that post. If you have a problem with it, talk to your freakin' family about it. And, be happy that you have people who care about you. They may not go about things the right way but if you never grow a pair of balls and talk to the people about how you feel, don't expect them to know how to react and/or treat you.

Whoooh!!! See what I mean, raging B.I.T.C.H.

Case in Point # 2 & 3 - Both traffic related. To the dumbass who likes to double park (or sit in her car as it's double parked) beside me so that she can call her daughter out into the middle of the street when picking her up from school, go park your freakin' car and get your lazy ass out and get her yourself! The school usually watches for this kind of thing but she seems to manage to slip through everytime. Drives me nuts!

And this is just common sense but, a traffic lane is not a place for you to come to a complete stop and turn your blinker on because you need to get over for the traffic light a half-mile ahead. Grrrr!!! I'll admit, traffic is not my strong point as far as remaining patient. LOL! This was just a bad day.

Ahhhhhh.............. I feel better. Thanks for listening to me vent.

Animal LOVER!

Meet Montie.

He is a 7 month old Great Dane and he is the spittin' image of Lola (photo on right sidebar). Only with a pee pee.

I came in contact with a woman who is saddened by the thought of having to re-home her precious puppy but she is unable to spend the time with Montie that he deserves.

I WANT HIM!

Hubs says "No!" LOL! And calls me an "Animal Hoarder" but I can't help it. He's so precious and he would be an excellent addition to our family seeing as though we already have a Dane and we're familiar with their temperament.

I still think I have a bit of schmoozing in me that may help. Wish me luck!

Monday Morning Weigh-In Results

Ok people! You must hold me accountable. I am about to share my weight with the world and oh gracious, it's not pretty.

DRUM ROLL PLEASE......

I weigh 173.8 lbs.

That is about 10lbs. of weight gain thanks to the delicious Holiday season I had last year. Crap!

My goal is to get down to 145lbs., that's damn near 30lbs. And to be honest, when I look at myself I wonder, "Where the hell is all that gonna come from?". Hopefully it's from my ass and my thighs.

Weight loss goal for this week - 2lbs. Nice and slow keeps the pounds away.

Oh, How I love Chick-fil-A

Yesterday was not a good day in my dieting world. I started off good, with a healthy shake (Herbalife) and a piece of wheat toast but it didn't end well at all.

We headed down to visit the in-laws and on our way, stopped at my FAVORITE fast food restaurant. Chick-fil-A. Yum! If you haven't noticed yet, fast food chains are starting to display the calorie count on their menus. At least in California they're doing it. A Chick-fil-A Chicken Sandwich meal complete with waffle fries (because why when I'm on a diet would I choose to substitute those with the fruit) will run you close to 1000 calories. Crap!

But like any other person on a diet who suffers from control issues, I caved. (Please tell me I'm not the only one who suffers with those issues.) I had my meal, complete with tasty waffle fries and their delicious sweet tea and you know what, I loved every minute of it. And exactly 5 minutes after finishing my meal and hopping in the car with the kids and hubs, I thought "why the hell did I do that?".

I tell myself this All. The. Time! Delicious foods that aren't good for you only offer your mind temporary satisfaction. Leaving your body to pay the price for what could turn out to be years to come.

I ended up having an American-sized portion for dinner along with way too much french bread. I blame that on being Italian. I can't resist pasta, breads, and all things carb.

In Pursuit of Sexy Legs - Take One

I started my diet, or ''life change" (again) on February 1st. Well actually, I started on January 30th with a run/walk/being dragged by my German Shepherd around our neighborhood. February 1st is just easier to remember

My goal - SMOKIN' Legs in time for summer.

I wasn't interested in being a part of that Revolution crowd that starts on January 1st with an extreme change and within 3 days they're cursing the New Year and saying, "2012 will be the year". That's the simple answer as to why I didn't start then. The truth? I was depressed. And I can only see that now that I am no longer depressed. I was in a rut, eating crappy food and not exercising due to a medical condition where I thought exercise would only worsen my condition. Yes, believe it or not, there are some conditions/diseases out there where exercise is actually not beneficial. Syringomyelia being one of them. Google it.

So I was majorly bummed, not happy with myself at all, and I don't know what happened but suddenly I was able to pull my whiny ass out of that rut. I'm motivated again and I am feeling great, even after only 4 days of being on a "clean" diet.

So back to the point of this post. I want sexy legs and I WILL have them this year. I have been self conscious about my legs ever since my weight gain with the pregnancy of my son. He's 9. I went many, many years where I would never wear shorts in public and still today, I am not comfortable walking around with my stems out. What's the problem? Dimples are my problem. I don't like them and I want them gone. I will not be comfortable in shorts until all my little fat dimples have disappeared.

This all may sound a little superficial but it is something that has bothered me for so long and I have let all these years pass by and I won't let another. Last year, I was so close to having my perfect legs, even wearing shorts more often because my comfort level was almost 100%. We'll say 80. Plus, it was so damn hot that I would've been a damn fool to walk around in jeans or even capris during the summer months. But, then came a new diagnosis and a scare in my mind that all my hard workouts were contributing to the Syrinx in my spinal cord growing larger.

On deck for this diet - Major decrease in calorie intake and replacing crappy (delicious) foods with healthy (not so tasty) alternatives. I've got the "Healthy Eating" thing down pat as I completely changed my diet once I was diagnosed with MS in 2009 (long story). As far as exercise, I'm starting out with walking and some running here and there but I hope to build up my endurance and only run within two months. The hard part is the cold weather is torture on my lungs so it hurts like hell to run at the moment.

I'm in need of a treadmill but that'll just have to wait as those damn things are expensive. I'll also start doing squats and lunges and a few other leg exercises to hopefully whip that area into shape faster. The rest of my body is pretty good so I'm not too concerned about focusing on only one body part. Even though I know that exercising other parts of the body and weight lifting helps burn calories. I have a plan, I'm focused on the legs, so I must stick with it.

And if I can lose 35lbs in the process, that would be great!

Preparing for Neuro Appointment

I'm in this hole right now, where my whole life is consumed with figuring out with absolute certainty what the hell is wrong with me. It's frustrating that this is consuming me but it is, after all, my life. The wonder and the wait will slowly eat away at you, if you're weak.

But I am not.

I have learned a shit load from my research and I am proud of that. I always use my newfound wisdom to help others whenever I can. One friend recently said this after I gave advice on a forum...

"Hi, MS'ers. Sarah is a walking encylopedia on MS. Everything she's ever told me checked out with my Neuro. She's worth listening to. She's also an upbeat person when ur down!!"

She failed to mention that I cuss a lot. I have to get it out somewhere, we have a swear jar here and I'm running out of quarters. :) But really, things like that make all my headaches and frustration worth it.

So between now and January 20th I am researching Fibromyalgia (FMS) and Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS). Like I need another issue, but I'm starting to think my leg pain is one or both of these diseases. I hear they like to strike together. I'm also researching Magnesium and the positive effects it has on the human body. For that, I've heard that magnesium works much like the pain reliever I'm currently taking, Neurontin. We'll see. I'll share more when I know.

P.S. I definitely need a new blog design because this one is hurting my eyes. Coming soon I hope.

The Introduction

Who am I?

Well, first off I am a wife and a mother. I have two children, a son who is 9 and a daughter who is 3. I am married to a dashing young lad (he's actually older than me) who is a Pilot in the military. And let's be honest ladies, any man in uniform who is out there protecting others instantly becomes a million times more delicious just because of that. I'm a lucky girl.

The family and I currently reside in Southern California with our 3 dogs and 2 guinea pigs. I love dogs. Guinea pigs, not so much, but they're cute. The "pigs" live in my sons room and are his responsibility. Surprising, they're still alive and seem to be doing perfectly fine.

Sounds pretty good, huh!? Well, here comes all the bullshit I'm dealing with. I'll just deliver the facts and we can go from there.

- October 29, 2009 - Diagnosed with Relapsing Remitting Multiple Sclerosis or RRMS
- November 11, 2009 - Started injecting myself daily with a disease modifying drug by the name of Copaxone.
- June 22, 2010 - Found out I was misdiagnosed and I actually don't have RRMS but that I have NMO, Neuromyelitis Optica aka Devic's Disease.
- June 27, 2010 - Stopped my daily injections (I never missed one just so you know. Even when my autoject started acting screwy and I had to do it manually. Eekkk!) The disease modifying drugs used to "slow the progression" of MS do diddley for NMO.
- November 17, 2010 - Met with an NMO specialist who at first glance thought that I did not have NMO. Good News! But told me that I do have a syrinx, a fluid-filled cyst within my spinal cord plus something else but he was unsure if it was MS and wanted to run some tests.
- November 17-18, 2010 - I went through 7 different tests during this visit and had to wait until January 4, 2011 for the results.

Oh the torture.....!!! If you've ever had to wait for test results that could majorly change your life, you know how I was feeling.

The Results:

I have slight color deficits showing on one test. I do indeed have a syrinx and the condition for that is called Syringomyelia. I do not have NMO but now I have possible MS. Now let me remind you, this is the NMO specialists, he is not the one who diagnosed me with NMO and he's not the one who diagnosed me with MS. So it seems like all this work that's been done to figure out what the hell is wrong with me over the last almost 2 years has gotten us nowhere. I started this journey in May 2009.

I meet with my original neuro later this month. And oh! He still thinks it's NMO. LOL! But hopefully these recent test results will give him a little more insight and we can all agree on something.

So there you have it, the extremely short version of my story. I am starting this blog because writing is very therapeutic to me, and I have a lot of shit to say.